Approximately 90% of all media news is negative in nature, (thus the saying "if it bleeds it leads"), with understandable impacts on our mental and emotional well-being.
Our ability to be resilient and maintain hope, confidence and a positive outlook is impacted by where we put our attention, or where we allow our attention to be drawn. A couple things work against us here - the first being "negativity bias" or the natural proclivity of our brains to notice the negative in order to protect us from danger.
The second is the "availability heuristic" or the fact that our view of life and decisions are made based on the information that is most available to us - which, face it, is dominated by those 90% of headlines that the media serves up highlighting the disasters, crises, and horrors.
But we are not helpless in the face of these factors that would have us thinking the world is an awful place. There are a number of things we can practice that can help provide some balance and even tip the scales to a healthier outlook on life. Note that the idea is not to deny the bad stuff, or look at everything through the proverbial rose-tinted glasses, but to cultivate the mental energy, the hope and the vision of something better that enables us to act in the face of what otherwise might look like overwhelmingly terrible odds.
1. We can make choices about where we put our attention. Will we spend more time reading the disturbing news, or making our own positive news? Will we attend to the latest biting comments flowing through our Facebook feed, or will we intentionally notice and appreciate the smile from our neighbor?
2. Practices such as gratitude, savoring and mindfulness can be used to train our brains to move away from the negativity bias and notice more of what is good and uplifting about the world. The simple act of writing down three good things that we experience each day, or three things that we are grateful for, reminds our brain that good things happen all the time.
3. We can take control over the stories that we tell ourselves. When a friend doesn't respond to our text, we can either tell ourselves that they must be mad at us, or we can tell ourselves that they are probably busy and missed the text. And even better, we can check on the validity of our story - "Hey did you see my text? I was worried when you didn't respond. I miss you and hope to connect with you soon."
4. We can write our own headlines about what is good and right with our worlds and the small but powerful moments of positivity, connection and hope. The following brief story about this is attributed to Andy Stanley in 2020:
"Sometimes I just want it to stop. Talk of COVID, protests, looting, brutality. I lose my way. I become convinced that this “new normal” is real life. But then I meet an 87-year-old who talks of living through polio, diphtheria, Vietnam protests and yet is still enchanted with life. He seemed surprised when I said that 2020 must be especially challenging for him. “No”, he said slowly looking me straight in the eyes. “I learned a long time ago to not see the world through the printed headlines. I see the world through the people that surround me. I see the world with the realization that we love big. Therefore, I just choose to write my own headlines. “Husband loves wife today.” “Family drops everything to come to Grandma’s bedside.” He patted my hand. “Old man makes new friend.” His words collide with my worries, freeing them from the tether I had been holding tight. They float away. I am left with a renewed spirit."
After reading this today, my headline now reads, "Woman blessed by the right message at the right time, and the reminders everywhere to open my eyes to beauty, kindness, awe and love."
What is your headline today? What headline will you live tomorrow?
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